This is my life.  Last Friday I waited for him to call so that we can go out and talk and hopefully figure out some things. But yet again the addiction won.  I was again devastated and I don’t know why?  I should have been used to this already and no matter how much it happens and/or how many times he does this, I am always taken back and somewhat surprised.  I was so angry that I begin to think of ways I can get some of this pain off of my heart.

Then I realized that he may be a trigger for me and decided that I needed to go to a meeting to remind me of the very essence of my own Sobriety. This is so dis-heartening.  I tried and I am tired and now decided that I am worth better. I am worth being swoop off my feet with someone who want to love me and not cheat on me with drugs and alcohol.  I will miss him yes, but I am free from all the drama that come with the usage.  I am calm in the midst of the storms that are raging within.  Thank you for my Higher Power!!!!RIE moon T-shirt2-01

Betrayed

This weekend became the last weekend I decided not wait …”no more” I waited until he got off work to go out to dinnet… Thinking, maybe he has hit that bottom that is needed for him to come to believe that his LIFE, heck my life has become unmanageable… but he never showed up…left me again holding my heart in my hands trying to protect it. Yes I feel betrayed and yes he used the drugs and alcohol to cheat on me!!! Its been 3 years and I know that if I stayed I will be using again… I can’t afford to loose what I have gain the 24years I been clean!!! Bye Bye… RIEgalaxy2 T-shirt-01

me!

WE are on our way to our 1st production of RIE T-Shirts, and other items such as; belt buckles, hats and jewelry.  I need to learn how to make them available and be able to send them out.  This is so exciting and I can’t wait for youRIE Logo2-01 to see them and wear them.. Here is an example;  Recovery is important and the arrow defines infinity… Recover to Uncover the Truth-Recovery for a life time…

WE have several options and once we are in production you will be able to order.  Thank you in advance for your support.

On another note, please Like my Facebook page “Recovery is Essential”… looking to see you and meet you.

Thank you and see you soon,

Stephani (PS, I’m watching Game of Thrones and I just got scared)

 

Today only

Today is one of those days I am feeling some kind of way… I know the signs and they never leave. Its only when I act within my feelings that they get stronger and stronger until I find something else to do. My mind races and I get this nervous feeling like “if I don’t do something now, I am going to burst”.  Then I just sit…. and wait in silence until the answer comes… and when I wait it happens….

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This is it…

This is my first time ever doing something like this.  Just like 24 years ago, when I decided to start my “recovery journey”…More about that later, however, I never knew this would be one of the best decisions I ever made for my life.  Now I want to share this journey with you.

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Stay tuned as I learn how to develop my web page and tell you more about “Recovery is Essential (RIE).  there is so much that is planned and so much to tell you about.  I guess I will let my grandchildren develop this page as they are more in tuned with this type of stuff.  Talk to you later…

 

Let me introduce myself…

my name is Stephani  and Thank you for coming to my page.  This is the home for those who are living a clean and sober life and we are not ashamed and are guilt free!  Yes we I said it, “guilt free”!!! find out how we do this and join the movement of living clean and sober and there is nothing wrong with that.  Yes, we all have a past, but today we are living a learned past and hope you will join us.

In Mercer County alone there is an alarming rate of alcohol and drug abuse and addictions.  In and out of prisons, in and out of suburbs and in and out of urban areas.  There is not one place where this problem does not exists.

Between functioning and over indulgence, we can not get a handle on this problem.  and there are many factors that play into this continuous problem-drug example picture 1.

We, people use drugs for many reason; , we want to feel good, cover some form of pain to stop feeling bad about something we may have done or what has been done to us out of pure curiosity or most importantly related to growing up and as a children “just want to fit it”…

Alcohol and drugs excite the part of the brain that make you feel good.  After which, once it is used over and over again,  it begins to take itself because the body becomes dependent on the substance and then it becomes the problem because  now it (the body) is dependent on the drug and/or alcohol.

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Thanks for letting me share and talk to you soon!!!